Page 4: Electric Boogaloo

Note the curious relationship between the position of the prince's head and the guard's crotch.
And I shall make no further comment about that.

Geez, it looks like my captors were shocked into oblivion by my escape.  Either that, or I'm trying to talk to a couple of lifelike guard statues.  Yeah, that must be it.  They're statues.  Yes.  Statues.  Yeah.

Statues.

I got out of jaaaaail. I got out of jaaaaail. Nyah-ha-hah! *raspberries*

Ah, my loyal royal ushers.  Still blocking the way, I see.  Good to know that a wedding turned tragic had no affect on you guys doing your pointless duty.  What say you, gentlemen?
 
Dude, she isn't.
...so this must be a joke. Goddamn, you guys are cruel.
Yes. I'm very lucky to have insensitive dicks like you as my guardsmen.
Look, fuckers, even though I hardly knew my bride, I'm still hurt by your remarks. You just don't underSTAND me! *wail*

Either (1) These guys are so dedicated to their work that they completely fail to notice everything that goes on around them, or (b) The king told them to make me feel like shit as further punishment, or (three) Something has gone terribly, horribly wrong.

Maybe the king and his court can help me sort this out.  At the very least, I can tell somebody to have those jerky guards tortured or maimed or suspended with pay or something.
 
Thank you, Mr. Togo.
Won't even look at me. Looks like someone needs to learn some respect for his arrogant superiors!

Uh...hmm.  By the first guard's indication, I thought that the king had spent the last hour or so telling the guards what an awful son I was, thereby leaving everybody with nothing to say to me.  The second guard gave me more cause to worry, unless I'm trying to talk to another strategically-placed guardlike statue again.  But why would someone place such a statue right next to a couple of identical (if non-communicative) guards?  Maybe someone wanted to give visitors the impression that the castle has more employees than it actually has, or that some members of the troupe are particularly well-trained in the art of stoicism.  And now I've managed to ramble on for ages about terribly uninteresting speculation, so nyah.
 
Uncaptionable Picture #1
Uncaptionable Picture #2

Oh!  Today is a sad day indeed!  Not only has my bride of the day been kidnapped, but now my closest friend refuses to acknowledge me.  Dear Ian.  Dear, dear Ian.  Everyone else knew you as the castle's requisite old wise man who wears a funny dress and hat.  But to me, you were much more.  While the king may have been my father, I knew that you were my dad.  I remember when the king would be too busy to play with me, and you would take the time to give me all the attention I craved.  Oh...the baseball games...the horsey rides...and who can forget all the times we went outside the castle walls and made fun of all the villagers?  They would smile and tolerate our taunts, because they knew we were better than them...but now, you've been reduced to this.  My father has turned you against me.  Even now, you turn to face me when I talk to you, but you remain unresponsive, as if I were merely a gust of wind that aroused enough attention to merit you turning my way...

Father.  You sitting bastard.  You'd better have a good explanation as to why my life has suddenly been shit upon.
 
...but you forgot that ass-scented escapipes have little to no resale value, you fool!
Game? You mean this bullshit charade that was supposed to remind me that I'm your subordinate? Ha! Ha, I say!

Oh, you mean, like, *this* game. How suddenly postmodern of you.

...oh.  Well, uh...um...I guess I'm totally fucked then, eh?  Can I at least have a moment of dramatic anguish?

*deep breath*

...nnnnnnnnnnNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!

...

Okay, I'm done.  Reset ahoy!

Just kidding. This now-glitched world merits further exploration...

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